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things that make me smile



Soror Sainted
12/21/13 20:00:14
Posts: 5
Casual Fan
things that make me smile



anaïs



dirty children hands
seeing that we still have milk , bandaids, noodles
baby lotion
waking up everynight at 3am for no reason and my cat always being in the same spot , he never leaves me , my neptune
My mantle , my holy chair covered in goldfish crumbs and neptune hair
Altars that I make daily
Candles
Sticks (broken and odd looking ones)
I love glass , and reflections
Lights
The smell of bleach
The smell of cheap lemon dish soap
Fabric softner
The smell of rocks
Of dirt
Of old.
Of books
My daughters hair
Incense
Carrot cake
Middle of the night texts
Vacumming
I love to read , I could read for days and never know the time changed and never care
Qtips
I love to find things out
I love wonders ,
Phenomenoms
Words that no one uses
I'd love to travel , but I'm agoraphobic
I like to feel safe , but the only person who makes me feel safe is hundreds of miles away from me , and whenever he comes to me I leave because I'm not a good enough person to be with him
He stays , for three years he stays with me , never complaining
I love bears and cats and stairwells and japanese things , I love victorian things , clothes jewelry, hair , shoes , lamps , rugs
I love children's books , I love to colour and make snowflakes out of paper
I love to make real potpourri
cinnamon the smell of cinnamon but not the taste
I love to study about rocks and religion and
I love on the internet this thing called "sacred texts" that I found
Its actually rained blood , diamonds and some other substances that can't be identified.


I suffer the anxiety of being left alone in my house so

I love this feeling..... being alone , but hearing in a distance the echo of some other human beings t.v . and saying to myself oh ok everythings ok I'm not alone ..that person is there too , it doesn't matter if I know them , if they are mean or a murderer , skinny , fat , red , blue , or white , I know I'm not alone . The distant sound of the price is right confirms it


I love dr. Pepper and chili ramen noodles
We are poor
I love my daughter.


It makes me smile to be sad but know that I made it another day
and my mittens smell like baby slobber , cat tails , and me
I am not alone .






Soror Sainted
12/21/13 20:06:56
Posts: 5
Casual Fan
Reply: things that make me smile

(Oh my god and turkey mayonaise provolone sandwiches with potato chips crumbled all over the top)



Ramsie
12/22/13 07:12:43
Posts: 134
Roadie
Reply: things that make me smile

many cool things to smile about.

not alone.
repeat all day with smiling

not alone.

(my husband and i have to repeat this together)
understand the irony of this.




..



Soror Sainted
12/22/13 07:31:50
Posts: 5
Casual Fan
Reply: things that make me smile

I wanted to share that with you .

Bless you.



Ramsie
12/22/13 07:40:07
Posts: 134
Roadie
Reply: things that make me smile

okay -
these are very strange but idk.
..
i have to be able to do them in weird uh spurts.
..

i like that his teeth fit.
properly now.
he can smile at me
and i can look at him


it is so

wrong that i am saying this

and
even if it weren't this way now
i would be dealing with it -uh accepting
no looking behind

i was
then
i almost fought "the wrong way"
it was uh "sticky"

..
but

he is able to wear his teeth and they made them work
right
they did something

and he looks like healthy'
his face his skin
his hands
..
i am still, when i look at him
.
i have forgotten what it is like to be a wife
or a friend
a human
but i

'can look"

i mean i make a ruckus if i freak out
if i think something is threatening

but i am
like "looking out"

i
fake a lot of thanks.

but that is how i got of thedruggz long ago.
no joke.
fakeit til you make it
i hate that crap it works.
omg.



Soror Sainted
12/23/13 02:32:23
Posts: 5
Casual Fan
Reply: things that make me smile

I bet he loves it when you smile .



Ramsie
12/25/13 02:23:53
Posts: 134
Roadie
Reply: things that make me smile

yes
he loves smiles
and so do i



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